Hey mama,

Yeah, you. The one who just got what feels like the most devastating news possible about that little baby in your belly. The room might feel like it’s closing in on you, you might be speechless, your chest tight. It probably feels like the dream you had in your head about this baby just came crashing downlike a snow globe thrown from the roof, shattering to pieces on the floor of that ultrasound room. You’ll desperately want to sweep up those shards and glue them back together or even just rewind time and try to prepare yourself in some way.

RELATED: To the Pregnant Mama Carrying a Child Who’ll Be Born Different

You’ll wish you didn’t walk into that ultrasound room with high hopes of finding out boy or girl, which seems so irrelevant now. You’ll wish you were prepared for something you never could’ve been prepared for. You’ll wish you didn’t miss that prenatal vitamin that random Sunday or wonder what else you could’ve done wrong. But I’m here to tell you that it wasn’t you, or anything you did. And as much and as often as you’ll wish you could go back and fix it, you can’t.

It’s too late.

Maybe it’s your first baby and this news has you reeling from the added stress. I mean, you had no idea what you’re doing to do begin with . . . how are you supposed to navigate being a new mom to a baby with “extra” needs? Or maybe it’s your second, or third, or fourth, and you have no idea how you’ll ever be able to handle everything that’s on your plate as it is . . . and now you’re being handed an extra plate, with a full bowl balancing on top.

You’ll probably crya lot. Some days you may want to curl into a ball. You’ll most likely want to blame yourself because . . . you just will. I’m guessing you’ll do lots of searching online, but if you have the self-control, I would try not to. You’ll stress and you’ll worry and you’ll wonder how you’ll do it or if you even can. But the hourglass always runs out of sand and that baby will come, ready or not.

And you know what? Once you see that beautiful face, you’ll be thankful for unanswered prayers.

Thankful for the inability to turn back time as you’d once wished.

Because that snow globe that came crashing down in the ultrasound room? I’m here to tell you those pieces weren’t shattered. There was just a small crack. The shards of glass were only in your imagination because as you saw that snow globe falling through the air you imagined the worst, but what you ended up with was the most beautiful gift you’ll ever see, imperfections and all.

RELATED: To the Mom Who Just Received Your Child’s Diagnosis

“I saw that you were perfect and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.”-Angelita Lim

You can do this.

A mama who’s been there

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

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Jenna Hatfield

My name is Jenna Hatfield, and I am from Hudson, NH. I have been married to my husband, Brad, for 10 years, and we have three wonderful children; Jackson, 6, Adalyn, 5, and Logan, 3. Logan was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate, and I have found writing and sharing about him (and motherhood in general) to be therapeutic to me, and, based on the messages I've received, inspiring to many others in similar situations. I am a Registered Nurse, but my passion lies in my part-time work with the nonprofit Cuddles for Clefts; helping in any possible way to provide support to parents and families as they navigate the unknowns of the journey. 

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