36 Universal Truths of Raising Toddlers

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While the sentiment of the popular meme is nice, your coffee will never be stronger than your toddler.
You will belly laugh at things they do . . . the first three times they do them.
The next 483723 times they do the same thing you will spend perfecting your fake laugh.
There will be times you think your child is a genius.
There will be other times you question how his brain works.
Preschool moms can be intimidating. Make an effort anyway. Who knows? They may be intimidated by you as well.
People who gift your child puzzles probably don’t like you.
In spite of what the box says, puzzles do not teach your child patience. They reveal how little patience you have.
You will be required to know the sound every animal on the planet makes. Have YouTube ready.
There will be screen time. Just embrace it and let go of the guilt.
There will be too many meals of mac & cheese, pizza, hot dogs, and PB&Js. Just embrace it and let go of the guilt.
You will definitely eat fast food. So will your toddler. Your efforts to fight it will be futile.
You will go to the bathroom with an audience.
You may even go to the bathroom while a little one sits on your lap . . .
. . . with their snacks.
No matter how punctual you were pre-kids, you will never be on time again.
There will always be a missing shoe when it’s time to leave the house.
Honestly, it might be your shoe that’s missing.
And you’ll probably find it tucked inside the soup pot in your cupboard.
You will begin to see glimpses of yourself in their speech and mannerisms.
This will both fill you with pride and break your pride.
They never have to go potty.
They are always starving for snacks.
You will drag them out of the park/zoo/store kicking and screaming on more than one occasion. Just accept it and ignore the looks from people.
Or come up with some witty comments for them, whatever suits you more.
There will be smells you cannot identify.
Buy Band-Aids in bulk. They use them like stickers.
You will still Google the craziest things.
And you will worry about things you didn’t before know existed to worry about. Things like the order in which your child’s teeth grow in. (See #28).
You will cherish the last few years of snuggles.
You will learn so much about yourself in these toddler years.
You will grow.
You will make mistakes.
You will laugh harder than you’ve ever laughed before.
You will cry harder than you’ve ever cried before.
And, if you allow yourself, you will find grace for each new day.

Keep going, mamas!

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Courtney Boulware

Courtney Boulware lives in the Midwest with her husband and two children, and enjoys library book sales, reading, college football, binge-watching The Office, and anything chocolate. She also pretends to enjoy working out (yay fitness!). Courtney blogs with her sister-in-law at www.letterseed.com.

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