By Elizabeth Pershing 
An open letter to youth hockey:
The tape is still wet on the stick of my second-year bantam who ended an amazing season with a heartbreaking loss, one game away from going to State. This letter is not about ref complaints, or dirty teams, crappy rinks or unruly fans. This letter is a thank you letter—a thank you letter to youth hockey. This is a thank you letter to Eagan Hockey. This is a thank-you letter to coaches, managers, rink rats, and hockey families.
People say hockey in Minnesota is a religion, and why that might be true for some, to me, it will always be family. My hockey family is family. I know many will agree with this, but thankfully, few know this deeply like my family does.
When my son was 13 and his sisters were 10 and 6, they lost their father.
Immediately, our hockey family rallied around us with calls, food, snow removal, and more. This is a ride-or-die kind of support that hockey people do well. Within a couple of days of losing his dad, my son had an away game. He wanted to play even though I couldn’t be there.
So he taped his stick, wrote “Dad” on it, and in true hockey family fashion, he was picked up (10 mins to my house + 30 mins to the rink + an hour before the game, you know the drill). He played that game in front of stands packed with hockey buddies from other teams and the boards lined with hockey dads there to support him.
It knocked the wind right out of me then, and still does today. It was quiet, meaningful, we show up for each other kind of support. There were emails to the community, which helped fill our meal train, and hockey moms came in full force with giant hockey sock “stockings” with gifts for each of us, including our dogs, for 25 days of Christmas.
The support in the early days was immeasurable. My kids saw how people show up for you when you need them. But, sadly, as many know, things get back to normal and people get back to their lives.
But hockey people don’t forget.
They keep showing up. Hockey dads, old coaches, and old teammates still support our entire family. And let us never forget the carpool. With three kids, and two in hockey, I can’t do it alone. The burden of getting to the rink early and having to miss another child’s event was tough. But thanks to generous friends who always offered to help drive, I could do my best to make it to everything. Maybe this is simplistic or minor, but not to me, and not to my kids.
What I have learned from youth hockey is this: People are good. People are generous. People show up for you in more ways than you can count. It could be the hockey dad hug before a game, the Wendy’s request after practice, or the precise timing of carpool pickup. Some of my closest friends were made during this crazy run of youth hockey (shout out, Squirt C Blue!).
I cried while I watched him struggle to leave the ice after his final game of bantams at his home rink. And of course, a hockey mom was right there to hug and cry with me. But what he said to his teammates in the locker room after the game is what will stay with me: “If it stings, you did it right.”
Thank you, Eagan hockey family, it sure does sting.
Love,
A happy, tired, grateful, sad hockey mom
Originally published on Twin Cities Family
by Katy Ursta 
by Connie Cumming 
