Motherhood gives you all the feelings.

It’s hard not to be utterly thankful for and grieve the little things of your last baby, trying to take in all of the firsts and lasts.

Every bin of clothes and baby gear packed up produces a tiny crack in a mother’s heart, breaking just a little bit more each time she says goodbye.

It’s not that she needs those baby clothes, but it’s the memories each outfit held that are difficult for her to let go of.

She does not want to forget those beautiful moments.

When she looks at that bin of retiring baby stuff, she sees:

The first smile.

The first bath.

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The first “mama” or “dada.”

The first time sitting up without toppling over.

The first slobbery kiss.

The first giggle.

The first awkward wave bye-bye.

The first time eating solids or sleeping for more than two hours at a time.

Each memory is impressed upon a mama’s heart forever.

Her last baby is a reminder that the lasts are her lasts too.

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While a mama will always appreciate the stage her babies are in, there’s something about the cuddles and slobbery kisses and arms reaching up for her when she walks into a room that will stay etched in her heart forever.

May we continue to treasure the firsts and the lasts of the stage our babies are in.

Originally published on the author’s blog