Gasp. My very first post and I’m talking about the d word. Bear with me, folks. I’m not here to tell you how awesome my marriage is. Nor am I here to give you 5 simple steps to save your marriage. I’m not qualified to do either. I don’t want you to feel an ounce of negativity or shame or anger or guilt from this post, either. I’m simply telling you what it’s like to be a newlywed in a world full of divorce. And a happy one at that.

We were 20 years old when Taylor asked me to be his wife and barely 21 when he became my husband. To say we were naïve is a bit of an understatement. That was almost three years ago, and to say we are still naïve is also a bit of an understatement. But it was such an exciting time for us, and I was so so happy. I had known since our second date that I was going to marry him. I think he knew too, but our decision making timelines are a little different 🙂

Our families supported us 100%, and after having ‘the talk’ with my dad, Taylor made it official. Everyone was so excited for us and most responded with “I just knew it!” or “we couldn’t be happier for you guys!” We were (and still are) so blessed to be surrounded by such caring and supporting people. But even with all of the positivity, some responses caught me off guard. People who didn’t know us super well showed worry, concern, and even fear for us. One lady even told me “Oh! You’re so young! I hope it works out….”

Ummm, thanks?

But as much as I wasn’t expecting them, the reality is that these responses are actually pretty appropriate when we consider how many marriages today aren’t “working out”. And as someone who believes with my whole heart that I will still be Mrs. Majerus 60 years from now, that absolutely terrifies me. Because as much as I would like to believe it to be true, no marriage is 100% immune to divorce.

Not even mine.

So what are we to do? Pray. Communicate. Acknowledge your lack of immunity and act on it. Sacrifice. Build your foundation on Christ. Work together as a team rather than two individuals. Take the driver’s seat when it’s your turn and the passenger seat when it’s not. Think of your spouse’s needs before your own. Let him spend the money you made on a another shotgun. Cook the poor guy supper once in awhile. Let him take two years to get a Craigslist grill in working order, and tell him how good he looks when he’s finally serving you that first burger (at least, that’s what I’m planning to do when he actually does finally grill me a burger…). Encourage him when he’s burnt out on work or school.

It’s going to look different for every marriage. But just as we spend time doing things to keep our own body healthy and building up its immunity, we must also do the same for our marriage. The odds are against us, people. And it’s going to take some conscious effort and a lot of it day in and day out to change that.

Photo by Studio W Photography
Photo by Studio W Photography

 KEA_021715_DigitalAds_550x186_2 (2)

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Kristin Majerus

Hello! My name is Kristin. I'm originally from central Nebraska but currently find myself in Omaha. My heart belongs to two people: 1. Jesus and 2. my husband and cat daddy Taylor. I work as a Personal Trainer and Taylor is working his way through Physical Therapy school, so I'm rocking the whole "married with no kids while my husband is in school single income family" thing. While Taylor is up to his eyeballs in textbooks and thera-bands, I can usually be found reading, writing, or working on making our one bedroom apartment a home. I'm so excited to share pieces of my life with you guys, and hope you find joy in following along. You can learn everything about me and then some at my personal blog https://kristinmajerus.wordpress.com/

I Thought Our Friendship Would Be Unbreakable

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Two friends selfie

The message notification pinged on my phone. A woman, once one of my best friends, was reaching out to me via Facebook. Her message simply read, “Wanted to catch up and see how life was treating you!”  I had very conflicting feelings. It seemed with that one single message, a flood of memories surfaced. Some held some great moments and laughter. Other memories held disappointment and hurt of a friendship that simply had run its course. Out of morbid curiosity, I clicked on her profile page to see how the years had been treating her. She was divorced and still...

Keep Reading

The First 10 Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking

In: Journal, Marriage, Relationships
The First Ten Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking www.herviewfromhome.com

We met online in October of 2005, by way of a spam email ad I was THIS CLOSE to marking as trash. Meet Single Christians! My cheese alert siren sounded loudly, but for some reason, I unchecked the delete box and clicked through to the site. We met face-to-face that Thanksgiving. As I awaited your arrival in my mother’s kitchen, my dad whispered to my little brother, “Hide your valuables. Stacy has some guy she met online coming for Thanksgiving dinner.” We embraced for the first time in my parents’ driveway. I was wearing my black cashmere sweater with the...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, I Loved You First

In: Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships
Man and woman kissing in love

Dear husband, I loved you first. But often, you get the last of me. I remember you picking me up for our first date. I spent a whole hour getting ready for you. Making sure every hair was in place and my make-up was perfect. When you see me now at the end of the day, the make-up that is left on my face is smeared. My hair is more than likely in a ponytail or some rat’s nest on the top of my head. And my outfit, 100% has someone’s bodily fluids smeared somewhere. But there were days when...

Keep Reading

Stop Being a Butthole Wife

In: Grief, Journal, Marriage, Relationships
Man and woman sit on the end of a dock with arms around each other

Stop being a butthole wife. No, I’m serious. End it.  Let’s start with the laundry angst. I get it, the guy can’t find the hamper. It’s maddening. It’s insanity. Why, why, must he leave piles of clothes scattered, the same way that the toddler does, right? I mean, grow up and help out around here, man. There is no laundry fairy. What if that pile of laundry is a gift in disguise from a God you can’t (yet) see? Don’t roll your eyes, hear me out on this one. I was a butthole wife. Until my husband died. The day...

Keep Reading

I Can’t Be Everyone’s Chick-fil-A Sauce

In: Friendship, Journal, Living, Relationships
woman smiling in the sun

A couple of friends and I went and grabbed lunch at Chick-fil-A a couple of weeks ago. It was delightful. We spent roughly $20 apiece, and our kids ran in and out of the play area barefoot and stinky and begged us for ice cream, to which we responded, “Not until you finish your nuggets,” to which they responded with a whine, and then ran off again like a bolt of crazy energy. One friend had to climb into the play tubes a few times to save her 22-month-old, but it was still worth every penny. Every. Single. One. Even...

Keep Reading

Sometimes Friendships End, No Matter How Hard You Try

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Sad woman alone without a friend

I tried. We say these words for two reasons. One: for our own justification that we made an effort to complete a task; and two: to admit that we fell short of that task. I wrote those words in an e-mail tonight to a friend I had for nearly 25 years after not speaking to her for eight months. It was the third e-mail I’ve sent over the past few weeks to try to reconcile with a woman who was more of a sister to me at some points than my own biological sister was. It’s sad when we drift...

Keep Reading

Goodbye to the House That Built Me

In: Grown Children, Journal, Living, Relationships
Ranch style home as seen from the curb

In the winter of 1985, while I was halfway done growing in my mom’s belly, my parents moved into a little brown 3 bedroom/1.5 bath that was halfway between the school and the prison in which my dad worked as a corrections officer. I would be the first baby they brought home to their new house, joining my older sister. I’d take my first steps across the brown shag carpet that the previous owner had installed. The back bedroom was mine, and mom plastered Smurf-themed wallpaper on the accent wall to try to get me to sleep in there every...

Keep Reading

5 Tips For Dealing With a Toxic Mother-in-Law

In: Grown Children, Journal, Marriage, Relationships
Woman frustrated with her mother in law

Many people admit to having difficulty establishing and maintaining relationships with their in-laws, however having a toxic mother-in-law can be especially tricky when balancing a relationship with your spouse. I have five simple tips that can help put you on a happier and healthier path when dealing with a toxic mother-in-law. 1. You don’t have to like your mother-in-law, or even be friends. Establish clear boundaries with your spouse. Let him know that it is OK for him to maintain a relationship with his mother without involving you. By doing this you can eliminate the pressure to please your mother-in-law;...

Keep Reading

To the Mother of My Son’s Future Wife

In: Grown Children, Inspiration, Kids, Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships
marriage, wife, husband, grown children, www.herviewfromhome.com

To the mother of my son’s future wife, I’m in the midst of dirty diapers and temper tantrums, but I do have days where I think about the future and what it will look like for my son. I wonder who he will be, what he will do and probably most of all, who he will love. I wonder about the type of woman he will bring home to meet us one day. I have my own thoughts on the type of person I wish my son would fall in love with, but we all know that the heart wants...

Keep Reading

Sometimes the Middle Child Needs a Little Extra Love

In: Kids, Motherhood, Relationships
middle child mother www.herviewfromhome.com

Mamas, look after your middles. Those babies who are born second, third, fourth or so in the birth order. The ones who are sandwiched between the idolized older sibling and the teeny tiny baby who stole everyone’s hearts. They need you more than you know. They need a little extra love from time to time. A hug and a “good job” here and there just to remind them that nobody has taken their spot in your heart since you added to your family. Try to remember they weren’t given a choice of their place in the lineup. If given the...

Keep Reading