As someone who has given birth and gone through the postpartum period in this pandemic, I’m sometimes overwhelmed by all that has been stolen from me in this season. As I’ve talked with other moms, the common grief and loss that comes up at times feels unbearable.
There’s the loss of baby showers and all the shared anticipation and celebrations with family and friends.
There’s a loss of a normal birth experience in the hospital and the fear of being alone at appointments and hospital visits when there are concerns with the pregnancy.
There’s a loss of sharing that new baby with family and friends when they are born and wondering when those you love most can meet this special new addition.
There’s the loss of having a community and village around you as you navigate this beautiful, new, and often exhausting and overwhelming stage of life.
There’s the loss of play dates and watching your children grow and develop relationships with other kids.
There has been so much loss and grief in this pandemic motherhood journey and I think it’s ok to mourn that.
Motherhood wasn’t meant to be done in a vacuum without a community to help you along.
We weren’t meant to do this in isolation.
And so I mourn this loss, but I also want to think about the things I’ve gained this season. Because if I just focus on the loss, I’ll miss this season of life that I won’t get back and I want to remember the good in the midst of this trying year.
I’ve appreciated the concentrated time I have with my little family watching it grow and establishing our own little traditions.
I’ve realized how little we really need when I was so used to having more.
I hope I will never again take for granted my family and friends and social activities and being out in the community with people.
I’m so thankful for our health and safety and those in our community who also help to keep my family well.
These are just a few of the losses and joys of this season and I’m sure many of you can relate and probably add many more. Just know you are not alone in your grief and it’s OK to be disappointed with how this particular season of motherhood has been. I hope we can continue to support one another through it because we are all in this together and we will come out the other side, hopefully stronger and able to face whatever else comes our way.
We’ve given birth and raised babies in a pandemic . . . what can’t we do?
Originally published on the author’s Facebook page