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In the beginning, I wanted to be a PERFECT mom. And I’ll never forget the first time I lost my calm and yelled.

My little one stopped and looked up at me. Surprised.

Then I cried, of course.

Because what kind of mom yells at a preschooler???

I felt like such a failure.

And before I knew it, I was ALWAYS failing. I forgot things. Or lost things. Or burned dinner. Or showed up late. Again.

Then I had MORE children. So, I failed a lot more too.

I didn’t sign this. I missed the email about that. I got the time wrong for soccer practice. Again. And the laundry?? Well, it rarely left the basket.

I’m 16 years in now. And I am still ALWAYS failing, it seems!

Still forgetting things. Losing things. Late for things.

RELATED: Even on Your Hardest Day, You’re Still a Good Mom

I get it wrong ALL THE TIME. And even though I pray for patience every day, I lose my calm. A lot.

I never imagined I’d be a mom who yells sometimes, but I do. More than I care to admit.

Sometimes I roll my eyes. I’m sarcastic. I get annoyed. I give my teenager snotty replies. I sigh heavily and say “Yeeeesss . . . I’ll rock you,” when I really just want my preschooler to go to bed already.

I mess up. A LOT.

It’s true.

Turns out I’m not perfect. Not even close.

But amid all that failing, I am learning to see the GOOD, too.

School lunches and signed planners and kisses on the tops of little heads before I send them off to school. Board games at the table or all of us snuggled up on the couch. Special treats from the store. Noisy dinners around the table and my attempt at High/Low for the day. Birthday cakes and trips to the park and an interested face at (almost) every single, “Hey Mom! Watch this!”

Then bedtime books and back tickles and whispered prayers every night before bed.

Day after day, I do for them, and pray for them, and cheer for them, and show up for them.

RELATED: The Fact That You Worry About Being a Good Mom Means You Already Are One

I keep trying.

And I LOVE them with my whole heart!

Yep. In the beginning, I wanted to be a perfect mom.

But it turns out I’m a GOOD mom who is HUMAN.

And mostly ordinary, after all.

So instead of a perfect story, I hope one day my children will tell this story:

Our mom messed up a lot.

She lost her temper. Sometimes she said a few choice words.

She forgot things. She missed things. She was a mediocre cook. And our house was often a mess.

RELATED: My Kids Think I’m a Good Mom—And That’s Everything

But she was quick to apologize. She forgave easily too.

Every day, she was proud to be our mom.

She showed up for us. And kept trying.

Our house was full of fun and laughter.

She wasn’t perfect . . . she was ordinary.

But we never for a moment doubted her extraordinary LOVE.

Mikala’s new book “Ordinary on Purpose” is available now wherever books are sold!

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So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Mikala Albertson

Mikala is a wife, family practice doctor turned mostly stay-at-home mom to five kids, and writer. She is the author of Ordinary On Purpose: Surrendering Perfect and Discovering Beauty Amid the Rubble available wherever books are sold. Mikala writes to give you permission to release your grip on all the should-dos and have-tos and comparisons and “I’m not measuring up”s and just be free to live your life. THIS life, however imperfect. In this body with these relationships in this house at this job with these parents and these circumstances. Your ONE precious, beautiful life! Join her on Facebook and Instagram.

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