Dear Lena Dunham,

I appreciate what you stand for. Body positivity, feminism, and so on. You’re the creator, writer and star of that show “Girls” on HBO. Although I have never watched it I support another female who is out there breaking barriers paving the way for our children. 

If only your actions spoke as loud as your words.

You seem to pull out the victim card way more than you pull out your credit card. You make outrageous statements quickly delete them and play the victim. Remember when you accused NFL player Odell Beckham Jr. of ignoring you because you were “not the shape of a woman by his standards.”  You ran to the internet and painted him as a sexist evil man smearing his character all because of assumptions made by you based on a glance. Maybe you’re just not his type, maybe he didn’t even see you, maybe just maybe he didn’t even know who you are? 

You claim you are a feminist yet your form of feminism hinges on the demonization of men.

Just this past weekend you trashed Father’s Day by tweeting, “You Don’t Need a Father” and when you realized how ridiculous that tweet was you quickly deleted it. But sadly, we all know nothing is ever truly deleted on the internet.

Lena, I’m a feminist too, but I don’t bash men and I certainly do not think that a father’s role in a child’s life is unnecessary. My father taught me valuable life lessons that only a father could teach a daughter. My father taught me to think before I speak, or in your case tweet. My father taught me to respect others while respecting myself, he also taught me how to be a strong confident woman and not label a man “sexist” if he doesn’t glance my way. See Lena, I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I’m okay with that. When my father died just a year and a half ago after a very long brave battle with cancer my world forever changed. I cry for my father every single day. 

How dare your claim to be a feminist and attempt to speak for all women. I can assure you Lena; you do NOT speak for me.

Dearest Lena, you can support women’s rights without hating men, you can support women’s rights without behaving like a classless loud mouth hiding behind the title of feminism.

If you truly cared about families, children and “feminism” wouldn’t it be in your best interest to advocate for more men to rightfully fill their duties as present fathers?

Dads matter. Men matter. I won’t bore you with statistics since much of the internet already has proven that Dads matter. But I will tell you that overall, children who experience fatherlessness have lower achievement in school and higher levels in aggression and delinquency.

I’m truly baffled why you picked Father’s Day to make such a ridiculous statement.

Feminism is hard work, it’s messy and complicated. Feminism is also vital for both men and women because it’s another word for equality. We need strong, educated women amplifying the cause. Feminism is not an excuse for abuse, man hating and creating controversy on special days like Father’s Day simply to get yourself publicity.


Lisa Ingrassia

Lisa is the Director of Events at Zenith Marketing Group, an insurance brokerage firm located in Freehold, NJ. She is passionate about sharing her father’s journey with cancer and bringing attention the difficult path a caregiver must walk. She has written guest articles for the National Foundation of Swallowing Disorders, The Mighty & Her View From Home. She is also a guest blogger for The Huffington Post. Fun fact: She’s obsessed with her Boston terrier Diesel and loves the color blue.