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Lord, teach me to number my days.

For these days spent mothering young children are few. The long nights and slow days seem infinite, but time silently slips away. They are babies today, but will be grown tomorrow. 

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For these tired arms that hold children day and night will soon be empty. The ache from holding growing babies will be replaced with an ache that longs to hold these children once again.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For these hands of motherhood will soon be free. And while they may not miss changing diapers or picking up toys, they will miss the sensation of caressing a child’s soft hair and wiping tears from those smooth cheeks.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For these eyes that are open during the long nights will someday find rest. But once rested, they will be struck with the realization that those long nights weren’t so long after all. And they will yearn to look into a baby’s eyes at midnight once more.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For the tears that cry for mama will one day dry up. The children who insist I never leave, will one day leave me. And I will long for them to beg me to stay once more.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For the small hands that hold mine will soon let go. My children will unclasp their hands from mine, gaining freedom and declaring independence. And as time moves forward, they will pursue safety and security in the hands of another.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For the feet that follow mine will soon turn the other way. The direction of my steps will no longer determine the direction of those little feet, and one day they will follow a path of their own.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For the car seat will soon become the driver’s seat. My driving companions will be driving a car of their own, and my own commute will be eerily silent. Their newfound freedom will leave me gripped with both wonder and worry.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For one day my children’s significant mother will be traded in for a significant other. The children who nestle their heads into my chest and request just one more goodnight kiss, will soon spend their nights in the arms of another.

Lord, teach me to number my days.

For these days spent mothering young children will soon be over. And the mundane moments of today will become the wistful memories of tomorrow. Help me to savor the long days, for they are limited.

Yes, these days with my children are most certainly numbered.

 

Originally published on A Beautifully Burdened Life by Jenny Albers

 

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Jenny Albers

Jenny Albers is a wife, mother, and writer.  She is the author of Courageously Expecting, a book that empathizes with and empowers women who are pregnant after loss. You can find Jenny on her blog, where she writes about pregnancy loss, motherhood, and faith. She never pretends to know it all, but rather seeks to encourage others with real (and not always pretty) stories of the hard, heart, and humorous parts of life. She's a work in progress, and while never all-knowing, she's (by the grace of God) always growing. You can follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

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