Lately, the trendy relationship advice seems to be: marry the guy who does all the things with you. All the stereotypical things he may not necessarily want to do, but he still does them anyway—for you.
I definitely hit the husband jackpot on this one.
He does the pumpkin patches, the apple orchards, the trick-or-treating, the Christmas light drives, parades, and literally anything else I can possibly think of to drag us all too.
He puts on the coordinated outfits, shaves, cuts his hair, smiles his perfect smile, and helps fulfill every single one of my family picture requests for the year.
He goes on shopping trips, brunches, movie dates, and is always open to scoping out that new restaurant or coffee shop I’ve been dying to try.
Of course, I give it all right back to him. I go hunting and ride in his tractor as much as I can. I go on trips to the hardware store, farm store, and have stood for hours at the gun counter.
He definitely deserves for me to do all the things he wants to do too.
All those things are completely important, but you know what else?
It’s not always about showing up for the things one of us wants to do more than the other.
It’s about the things that neither of us wants to do.
Going along for those things are the times that really sink in. Those are the times that really hug my heart the most.
It’s those times that I always make extra sure to stare my husband straight in his handsome eyes and say, “Thank you for being you and being here with me today.”
He’s always by my side, holding my hand at a funeral. He’s there with his arm wrapped around me, ready to hand me his handkerchief right at the moment I realize I should’ve grabbed some tissues.
He’s with me at the grocery store on Sunday afternoons when we’d both rather be at home relaxing, but he knows how much easier it is on me to have an extra cart pusher and manly arms to carry the bags.
He’s drinking before-dawn coffee with me at the pediatric dentist or the hospital if one of the kids needs a filling or tubes in their ears.
He’s with me at the hospice house and at the funeral home when arrangements need to be made. He’s having a picnic with me at the cemetery on Father’s Day.
He’s with me when it’s a moving day for any of our friends or family, and he’s there later that night so we can take turns smothering pain relief gel on our sore muscles.
He goes with me to the doctor or the chiropractor when I’m too nervous to go by myself or even if I’m not, just so I have some company.
He attends all the school events, sports games, conferences, dance recitals, concerts, and any other kid-related activities that parents are always so excited for but also low-key dread to some extent.
At the end of the day, those are the things that hold the most weight.
Life can’t always be a walk around the county fair.
Don’t get me wrong, those fun, family vacations and ballgame outings are incredibly meaningful.
But there’s nothing better than knowing whenever there’s something you have to do that you’re not crazy about doing, for whatever the reason, your other half will be right there with you.
You know you’ll walk in holding hands, fingers laced, giving each other strength and both ready to take on anything . . . together.
Sure, marry the guy who goes to the pumpkin patch, but make sure he shows up to all the surgeries and funerals, too.