So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

Let’s be real, we all make mistakes. I don’t care if your last child’s birthday party would have qualified you for Mom of the Year at the Pinterest Party-Throwing Awards, you have done something in your career of mothering that made you shake your head at yourself and look around to be sure no one noticed.

I do those kinds of things every single day.

This is the ugly truth about motherhood. I assume some others share this fallibility to maintain my own sanity. I feel sure at least one of my kids will end up in therapy because of me, but doesn’t that mean I did something right?

Here are the top five (of many, I’m sure) confessions of a real mom:

1. Sometimes My Kids Use Dirty Dishes
If I am being totally honest, my one-year-old daughter has eaten more food off of the floor than I care to admit. This morning, I rinsed out a sippy cup of water to send with her to daycare because I just plain didn’t have time to wash it. So, yes, mom fail. My kid will be drinking remnants of last night’s dinner with her lunch today.

2. I Forget Bath Times 
At the risk of sounding like Adam Sandler in Big Daddy, I may have had the smelly kid in class. It isn’t an intentional lack of parenting skills. This is survival mode. Our son has karate twice a week, soccer twice a week, and occupational therapy once a week. That is on top of homework and whatever else our family has going on. I am sure to at least hose his hind end off in the yard after soccer practice, but good grief, one week I completely forgot to bathe our baby girl for four days in a row. FOUR DAYS!

I know, I know. Get your Mom of the Year nomination cards ready. I don’t know how you moms of several kids or single parents do this everyday and manage not to look like a train hit you in the mornings. Just today, I guarantee I look like I wrestled a bear on my way to work and I had a husband to help me prep the kiddos for school.

3. I Lie to My Kids
Full disclosure: I am going to have some real explaining to do when my six-year-old son realizes that all moms don’t actually have eyes in the back of their heads. This weekend when I couldn’t turn around to see whatever shenanigans he insisted I watch in the back seat, he said with full confidence, “Okay, well can you just turn on your back eyeballs on and watch me?”

Y’all I can’t help it. Sometimes it is easier to tell my kid that chocolate milk comes from brown cows and white milk comes from white ones instead of dodging the incessant barrage of questioning that will follow when I tell him the truth. He will understand one day, right?

4. I Cry More Than I Care to Admit
In the bathroom, in bed when I can’t sleep, or in the car on my way to work—I cry a lot these days. Parenting is a messy, thankless job; parenting a child with behavior disorders is a job that should come with a hard hat and hazmat suit.

There are many mornings where I have already been hit, spit on, screamed at, and told how much I am hated all before 7 a.m. so yes, I cry on my way to work sometimes. Many days it feels like that is all I have left and if I get it out in a safe place where I won’t feel judged by anyone else, then I might be able to make it through the work day.

There have been countless (and I mean countless) times when I have gone in the bathroom, leaned against the wall, and slid down hugging my knees and sobbing into my legs so my husband can’t hear and my kids who are peering at me from under the door can’t see my tears. Sometimes, I am crying because I am disappointed in myself. Sometimes, I cry because I am so frustrated with my son. Other times, I cry because I feel like it is all of the emotions I have pushed down for weeks and they just came bubbling up like hot lava and I can’t stop them.

Regardless of the reason, this is my honest place and that is the truth. I cry a lot these days.

5. I Don’t Always Make The Best Decisions
When you raise tiny humans, you are tasked with about a billion decisions a day. What toothpaste is the best to use? When should you take them to the dentist? Do chocolate Pop-Tarts qualify as a breakfast food? Does it make me a bad mom that the teenager working the Chick-fil-A drive through knows me by name?

When you are bringing up a child with behavior disorders, your decision list lengthens by miles. What specialist is most qualified? Will therapy help my child’s behaviors? Can we afford therapy and medication? Should we be medicating at all? Will the lady in the check out line actually call CPS when my son is having a Mach 5 meltdown because I am ignoring his screaming and kicking over not getting to choose the bananas?

You see the difference? I am going to mess up, people. It is inevitable. These kinds of decisions are what keep me up at night. This is what causes stress in marriages. This is why I drink Coke instead of water sometimes. It is why I have a hidden stash of dark chocolate so no one gets punched. This is why I have chosen to nap instead of jog and why the 20 pounds I had worked so hard to shed after baby number two has found its way back to my ever-widening hips. I mean, this is real life, in the trenches, not made for the faint of heart mothering.

So, mamas, trust me. There is always someone out there who is worse off than you. If you are raising a “normal” child, or single parenting, or foster momming, or bringing up a child with disabilities, or struggling with infertility, I praise you and I pray for you. Keep doing what you are doing. Sure, we may make a wrong choice or even be the reason our kid wears black nail polish one day, but we are human. We are doing the best we can and that is the best we can offer.

Keep it up! We are all in this fight together!

Brynn Burger

Mental health advocate, extreme parent, lover of all things outdoors, and sometimes a shell of my former self. Parenting a child with multiple behavior disabilities has become both my prison and my passion. I write so I can breathe. I believe that God called me to share, with violent vulnerability and fluent sarcasm, our testimony to throw a lifeline to other mamas who feel desperate to know they aren't alone. I laugh with my mouth wide open, drink more cream than coffee, and know in my spirit that queso is from the Lord himself. Welcome!

Welcome to Periods in Your 30s and 40s

In: Health, Humor
Welcome to Periods in Your 30s and 40s www.herviewfromhome.com

Do you remember that day in the fifth grade when the boys and girls were separated for the “Sexuality and Development” talk? Some nice old lady health teacher came into your room and gave you some straight talk about how the next few years were going to go for you. It was awkward and shocking and you knew your childhood would never be the same. When you hit your mid-thirties, there should be some kind of Part Two to that conversation. All the ladies need to be rounded up, lead into a dimly lit classroom that smells vaguely of pencil...

Keep Reading

How to Stay Married For (at Least) 10 Years

In: Humor, Relationships
How to Stay Married For (at Least) 10 years www.herviewfromhome.com

In July, my husband and I celebrated our 10-year wedding anniversary. We got married back in 2008 following my college graduation. I was only 22 at the time and him? Well, he was all good-looking at the prime age of 30. There were may vocal skeptics who chimed in, unasked of course, to share with us their belief that we would “never last” and that it would “never work”. To them, I say, “You were wrong! Na-na, na-na, boo-boo!” Just kidding, of course; I don’t talk like that. I am a respectable mother, not a four-year-old child and thank goodness...

Keep Reading

How to Put Your Children to Bed in 46 Easy Steps

In: Humor, Kids
How to Put Your Children to Bed in 46 Easy Steps www.herviewfromhome.com

It was time. It had to happen. We’d had a good run at pouring our children into bed at 11:30 p.m., sweaty, sticky, and exhausted from their head to their toes.  But bedtime had to get back to its (somewhat) regularly scheduled program.  When we had one kid, bedtime was a breeze.  Each night, we had a 10 step process. And the steps were simple. And very, very routine. 1. Toys away at 7:10 p.m. 2. Up the stairs at 7:15 p.m. 3. Change into pajamas 4. Brush teeth 5. Read two books 6. Say prayers 7. Light off 8....

Keep Reading

Welcome to the Dreaded Man Cold Season

In: Health, Humor
Welcome to the Dreaded Man Cold Season www.herviewfromhome.com

Your husband has a mere headache, but he automatically now believes that he is going to be a chronic sufferer of cluster migraines. Or, maybe he got a small splinter, but he now believes that he is, without probability, going to end up with a staph infection. And, well, that cough of his (cough, cough) is going to have him laid up in bed for the next two days because he is just feeling so terrible. Sound familiar? It is all too familiar to me. What am I talking about? How men are babies when they get sick. Yes, I said it. I...

Keep Reading

Wanted: Imperfect Friends

In: Humor, Relationships
Wanted: Imperfect Friends www.herviewfromhome.com

Is anyone else as sick of the facade as I am?  Because on social media, everyone seems to have their crap together. But I sure don’t.  Scrolling through my feeds leaves me feeling inadequate and lonely, desperately lonely.  I know social media is only the high points. I know there is always more going on behind the scenes that I don’t know about. But at the end of the day, I just feel like there’s no one who would want to be friends with little, imperfect, insignificant, me.  So, I’m placing an ad.  Wanted: Imperfect Friends A kind, but quirky,...

Keep Reading

51 Reasons a Mom Might Be Late

In: Humor, Motherhood
51 Reasons a Mom Might Be Late www.herviewfromhome.com

I’ve got a question for all you moms out there: Have you ever been late? Yeah, me neither. Just kidding! We’ve all been there. We have an appointment, a meeting, an event, or just a playdate, and we want to be on time. In fact, it often looks and feels like we’re going to be on time. We’ve planned ahead. We have everything in order, and we are ready to head out the door. But then, without fail, the inevitable happens. Actually, it seems that a good number of inevitables happen. And we’re running late, again. Being on time is...

Keep Reading

5 Ways Boy Moms Always Ruin Our Fun

In: Humor, Kids
5 Ways Boy Moms Always Ruin Our Fun www.herviewfromhome.com

We know Mom loves us, don’t worry about that . . . but sometimes it seems like she’s just making up a whole pile of rules to ruin our fun. For instance, we’ll be in the middle of a huge independent project and she’ll come along, usually shriek, and be like, “You can’t use water guns to fill up the bathtub! And why are you shooting water into the toilet? Ewwwwww.” And just like that, we have to pack it all up and return to a clean orderly activity. A controlled activity. A zero fun activity. We’re not even sure...

Keep Reading

Should Grandparents Get Paid to Babysit?

In: Humor, Journal
Should Grandparents Get Paid to Babysit? www.herviewfromhome.com

While swaying in side-by-side hammocks, my daughter paid me the ultimate compliment: “It gives me enormous peace of mind while I’m working, to know you’re watching my son and that he’s in the most capable hands.” Then 10 seconds later while I was still orbiting in happy mode, she insulted me by offering to PAY me for this glorious privilege. We engaged in a little tit for tat tug of war with no clear winner. And the debate rages on, at least in our household. How about yours? To pay or not to pay the loving grandparents who bless us...

Keep Reading

Kids Today Will Never Know the Joy of a 90s Summer

In: Humor

So you want a good old fashioned 90s summer, huh? I don’t blame you. The 90s rocked! (Literally, thanks to Kurt Cobain and Eddie Vedder.) I’m not going to lie—I take slight offense to the use of “old fashioned” and “90s” in the same sentence, as I’m pretty sure the 90s were like 10 years ago, but I’ll still help you out. If you’re really doing this though, you’ll need to ditch some of your modern conveniences, like your phone. I know, I know, but it’s a requirement. You may bring a beeper or clunky flip-phone, but no internet allowed...

Keep Reading

Dear Kids, This Is Not An Uber

In: Humor, Kids
Dear Kids, This Is Not An Uber www.herviewfromhome.com

Paid automotive transportation is pretty simple. You hop in the backseat of a cab, share the address where you are going and aren’t required to speak any longer until you arrive at your destination and pay the driver. The same primary rules apply to taking an Uber or Lyft.  The unwritten rules have been in place for some time. Your trade-off for taking paid transportation is a ride in the backseat, where you don’t have control over the music, the temperature of the car, the route the driver takes or how fast the trip takes, not even the amount of...

Keep Reading

5 Secrets to the

BEST Summer Ever!

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Creating simple summer memories

with your kids that will  last a lifetime