Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

You’re an amazing mom, but if you’re like me, I bet that sometimes you feel like a failure.

Did you scream at your kids today because you are sick and tired of seeing more toys and clothes on your kitchen counter tops than food and appliances? Or maybe the toys and clothes are starting to mingle WITH the food on the counters!? That never happens, right?

Or maybe, you are deliberately choosing to surf Facebook instead of sitting and playing another game of aliens attacking the Lego house on the floor with your little one because, you just can’t.

Hey, I’m here to tell you from one mom to another, that it’s really OK.


So you just sit on that bathroom floor and pretend that you’re pooping so your kids will leave you alone for the next few minutes that it will take you to read this post. Cry if you need, but then pull yourself together and let me encourage you a bit.

You may feel like a failure because of these, and many other times that you are not the perfect example of patience, love and grace to your precious bundles of joy. You may see all those posts about being intentional with your kids, putting your phone down and engaging with them, lifting them up and growing them into confident and joyful little beings by being a confident and joyful being yourself.

You may hear that you should encourage and compliment and say yes, more than you say no. You may wonder how you are supposed to do that when your kids are counter surfing with their muddy shoes on to steal the cookies, again!

While having extra genetic doses of confidence, patience, grace and general nicey-niceyness as a mom is helpful when raising kids, it certainly not a prerequisite—or there would be A LOT less of us allowed to procreate, am I right?

Here’s the kicker, and the thing that made the difference for me. Your kids don’t care if you are an A+ kind of mom who rocks at making all the meals, and doing all the perfect things, and not losing your mind sometimes! You are not a failure as a mother unless you literally quit on your kids. If you’re reading this, I can guarantee that you are not ready to quit on your kids.

Your kids are happy with you being a C- mom as long as you love them and they know it! Here’s why . . . 

Even when you come home from work stressed and snap at them (because after all day at your job you just can’t deal with the chaos and mess of your home), you sit on their bed and say “I’m sorry,” and they know that you mess up sometimes, just like them.

When you fail and lose your cool in the moment over something small, they know that no matter how mad or upset you ever get, you will still open your arms to them and protect them from the world.

When they come to you with a school project that is due tomorrow, you curse and show your open irritation, but you still stay up and help them, sacrificing your own sleep for their cause. They know that you are always there for them. They know you are never going to quit on them.

Being a good mom is a tough job! But don’t let yourself believe that you need to be perfect in order to be a good mom. That is a lie, and stopping that lie the second it enters your mind will do wonders for your momfidence (mom+confidence)!

If you are loving your kids the best that you can, then you’ve made it as a mom. There really is no perfect mom land, and no better place to be than right where you are.

There is no perfect motherhood formula, and no perfect line that you can walk as a mother to ensure that you are perfectly balanced and giving just the right amount to yourself, your kids, your husband, and your job. You do your best—that’s it.

You are not a failure as a mother even when you get it wrong with your kids because motherhood in and of itself is about loving and raising kids—not being perfect.

So moms, do your best, love your kids, yell and cry when you need to, apologize when you need to, and throw your hands up in victory at the end of the day. Have confidence in yourself, knowing that you really are the best mom to raise those kids of yours.

After all, they don’t want a perfect mom, they want you!

Originally published on the author’s blog

You may also like:

Motherhood Doesn’t Require Perfection—it Just Requires Your Whole Heart

I Want to be a Perfect Mom—But I’m Not

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Amber Prohaska

Amber is a mom of 4 crazy kids who keep her running like a maniac! Her most favorite place to be is at home with her chaotic clan. You can generally find her writing about what's on her heart, or hiding in the bathroom eating chocolate, or sometimes both!  Find more of her writing at www.thissimplelifeblog.com, on Facebook at This Simple Life, and Instagram @thissimplelifeblog.

I Obsessed over Her Heartbeat Because She’s My Rainbow Baby

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Mother and teen daughter with ice cream cones, color photo

I delivered a stillborn sleeping baby boy five years before my rainbow baby. I carried this sweet baby boy for seven whole months with no indication that he wouldn’t live. Listening to his heartbeat at each prenatal visit until one day there was no heartbeat to hear. It crushed me. ”I’m sorry but your baby is dead,” are words I’ll never be able to unhear. And because of these words, I had no words. For what felt like weeks, I spoke only in tears as they streamed down my cheeks. But I know it couldn’t have been that long. Because...

Keep Reading

Round 2 in the Passenger Seat is Even Harder

In: Motherhood, Teen
Teen boy behind the wheel, color photo

Here I am, once again, in the passenger seat. The driver’s side mirrors are adjusted a little higher. The seat is moved back to fit his growing teenage limbs. The rearview mirror is no longer tilted to see what’s going on in the backseat. Yellow stickers screaming “Student Driver,” are plastered to the sides of the car. The smile on his face is noticeable. The fear in mine is hard to hide. These are big moments for both of us. For him, it’s the beginning of freedom. Exiting the sidestreets of youth and accelerating full speed into the open road...

Keep Reading

Here on the Island of Autism Parenting

In: Motherhood
Son on dad's shoulders looking at sunset over water

Hey, you. Yes, you there: mom to a kid on the spectrum. Well, you and I know they’re so much more than that. But sometimes those few words seem so all-consuming. So defining. So defeating. I see you when you’re done. That was me earlier today. I had to send a picture of a broken windshield to my husband. I prefaced the picture with the text, “You’re going to be so mad.” And you know what? He saw the picture, read my text, and replied, “I love you. The windshield can be fixed. Don’t worry. Just come home.” I think,...

Keep Reading

We’re Walking the Road of Twin Loss Together

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Mother and son walk along beach holding hands

He climbed into our bed last week, holding the teddy bear that came home in his twin brother’s hospital grief box almost 10 years earlier. “Mom, I really miss my brother. And do you see that picture of me over there with you, me and his picture in your belly? It makes me really, really sad when I look at it.” A week later, he was having a bad day and said, “I wish I could trade places with my brother.” No, he’s not disturbed or mentally ill. He’s a happy-go-lucky little boy who is grieving the brother who grew...

Keep Reading

Somewhere Between Wife and Mom, There Is a Woman

In: Living, Motherhood
Woman standing alone in field smiling

Sometimes, it’s hard to remember there is a woman behind the mom. At home, you feel caught between two worlds. Mom world and wife world. Sometimes it’s hard to balance both. We don’t exactly feel sexy in our leggings and messy mom bun. We don’t feel sexy at the end of the day when we are mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted from being a mom all day. The truth is we want to feel like ourselves again. We just aren’t sure where we fit in anymore. RELATED: I Fear I’ve Lost Myself To Motherhood We know the kids only stay...

Keep Reading

Until I See You in Heaven, I’ll Cherish Precious Memories of You

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Toddler girl with bald head, color photo

Your memory floats through my mind so often that I’m often seeing two moments at once. I see the one that happened in the past, and I see the one I now live each day. These two often compete in my mind for importance. I can see you in the play of all young children. Listening to their fun, I hear your laughter clearly though others around me do not. A smile might cross my face at the funny thing you said once upon a time that is just a memory now prompted by someone else’s young child. The world...

Keep Reading

Friendship Looks Different Now That Our Kids Are Older

In: Friendship, Living, Motherhood
Two women and their teen daughters, color photo

When my kids were young and still in diapers, my friends and I used to meet up at Chick-fil-A for play dates. Our main goal was to maintain our sanity while our kids played in the play area. We’d discuss life, marriage, challenges, sleep deprivation, mom guilt, and potty-training woes. We frequently scheduled outings to prevent ourselves from going insane while staying at home. We’d take a stroll around the mall together, pushing our bulky strollers and carrying diaper bags. Our first stop was always the coffee shop where we’d order a latte (extra espresso shot) and set it in...

Keep Reading

Moms Take a Hard Look in the Mirror When Our Girls Become Tweens

In: Motherhood, Teen, Tween
Mother and tween daughter reading

We all know about mean girls. They’re in the movies we go to see, the television shows we watch, and the books we read. These fictional divas are usually exaggerated versions of the real thing: troubled cheerleaders with a couple of sidekicks following in their faux-fabulous footsteps. The truth about mean girls is more complex. Sometimes, they aren’t kids you would expect to be mean at all: the quiet girls, sweet and innocent. Maybe she’s your kid. Maybe she’s mine. As our daughters approach their teen years, we can’t help but reflect on our own. The turmoil. The heartbreak. The...

Keep Reading

A Mother’s Love is the Best Medicine

In: Kids, Motherhood
Child lying on couch under blankets, color photo

When my kids are sick, I watch them sleep and see every age they have ever been at once. The sleepless nights with a fussy toddler, the too-hot cheeks of a baby against my own skin, the clean-up duty with my husband at 3 a.m., every restless moment floods my thoughts. I can almost feel the rocking—so much rocking—and hear myself singing the same lullaby until my voice became nothing but a whisper. I can still smell the pink antibiotics in a tiny syringe. Although my babies are now six and nine years old, the minute that fever spikes, they...

Keep Reading

Here’s to the Saturday Mornings

In: Living, Motherhood
Baby in bouncer next to mama with coffee cup, color photo

Here’s to the Saturday mornings—the part of the week that kind of marks the seasons of our lives. I’ve had so many types of Saturdays, each just a glimpse of what life holds at the time. There were Saturdays spent sleeping in and putting off chores after a long week of school. And some Saturdays waking up on the floor in a friend’s living room after talking and prank calling all night. I’ve spent many Saturday mornings walking through superstitious pre-game routines on the way to the gym, eating just enough breakfast to fuel me for the game, but not...

Keep Reading