Our fall favorites are here! 🍂

What they don’t tell you about child loss . . . 

They don’t tell you that you’ll never be the samenot that you won’t ever feel joy or love the life you havebut that it changes you. They don’t tell you about the countless sleepless nights and the not knowing why, holding your thoughts captive and the guilt that threatens to creep in. 

They don’t tell you about the hole that can never be filled or replaced mostly because you never ever want it to. You don’t want it to because you hold space for your child, and you don’t want that to ever go away.

RELATED: He Took His Last Breath in the Only Outfit I Ever Bought Him

They don’t tell you about the questions . . .  How many kids do you have? How old are your children? Are you going to try for a girl or a boy? When are you going to have another? 

They don’t tell you about the looks people will give you once you tell them your baby has died. 

They don’t know what to say or do. Neither do you. They don’t tell you about the endless tears,

But . . . they also don’t tell you that you will smile. You will smile at the wildflowers as the sun shines and the warm sun kisses your face. That you will laugh as you watch your other children grow and become the goofy, loveable, amazing humans God created them to be. 

RELATED: You Are Allowed To Grieve Loss—Even if Other Parts of Your Life Are Good

They don’t tell you that you will gain compassion like none other for those who are hurting because you’ve been there and you can feel deeply what they have feltand in an incredibly difficult way, that becomes a gift. 

They don’t tell you that you will see life differently . . . 

More beautiful, more sacred, more precious because this time is all we have. They don’t tell you that every day you will dream about seeing your baby again, about holding her, about being with her. Heaven feels a whole lot closer. Not that you don’t hold all these earthly moments sacred but that you have a treasure like no other to look so forward to.

To the child loss mamas, you are a special kind of beautiful, and I pray you know you are not alone.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Kristen Murphy

My name is Kristen Murphy.  My husband and I reside in beautiful Alberta, Canada in a small town.  We have three beautiful children; Ryan, Sarah and Caleb.  On October 4, 2019 our daughter Sarah went to be with Jesus.  My hearts joy is to write about what that has all entailed and to be able to help others walking through loss.

Grief is a Constant Companion for the Mother Who’s Lost a Child

In: Grief, Loss
grieving mother www.herviewfromhome.com

I’m sorry for your loss. Loss is something that is never easy, but especially excruciating when it was the life you created, carried, birthed, and held. It is so important to remember your child, but also important to remember you. Grief is one of the most uncomfortable topics in the world. When you grieve, you often struggle to capture the wide range of emotions felt day-to-day, or you struggle to grasp what kind of support you need when asked. But for others watching you grieve, it’s awkward and sometimes silent. People say the words “take as long as you need” and...

Keep Reading

Dear Grieving Mother, Don’t Let the World Pressure You Into Forgetting the Child You Lost

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Man hugging sad woman

Grief is a vulture—circling the carrion of our loss as we watch from spectator seats. As if the loss of our daughter didn’t happen to us, but to someone else. The holy moments shared between my husband and me, those few days in the hospital, are an unseen golden tether that keeps us each above water.  That is our reality, one we try so hard to keep closed in a box on a shelf. But as the months count down to August, as the anniversary of Hazel’s stillbirth closes in, tremors shake the lid and unconscious grief slips out.  But...

Keep Reading

Check In With Your Bereaved Mom Friends, Their Hearts Are Still Hurting

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Woman walking in sunset

No mother should ever have to bury her child. But it happens all the time. And this week it was a family we know, making my heart heavier and taking me back just a bit to the familiar feelings of four years ago. I’ve been there. We lost my 3-year-old son in 2016. Disbelief was my first and lasting emotion. Sadness had not yet set in because I didn’t understand how it could actually happen. Disbelief. I mean, really. Seven days prior, we were at home taking pictures because it was a dress-up day at school. Then just one short...

Keep Reading