When I sat down on the first day of science class in 8th grade, I didn’t know you.
I didn’t know the color of your eyes or the exact shape of your chin. I didn’t know the sound of your laugh or the way you would draw when other people were taking notes.
But God knew.
When we first started dating, and you picked me up in your parent’s old Oldsmobile, I didn’t know what would come next.
I didn’t know that you would be the one I could look to for comfort when the world felt crazy—even when I refused to share the crazy parts out loud.
When we went off to separate colleges and everyone said it wouldn’t last, I didn’t know how we would make everything work.
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I didn’t know we would ask for calling cards for Christmas so we could talk long distance, or you would make the six-hour drive to see me once a month or whenever you could afford the gas money. I didn’t know we would learn to talk through issues on a phone instead of face-to-face, or that we would treasure face-to-face so much that fights ended quickly so as not to waste a moment on anger.
But God knew.
When you asked me to marry you late one evening in a deserted park, I didn’t know what I was getting into.
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I didn’t know what kind of husband you would be or what kind of wife I would make. I didn’t know who would take out the trash and who would do the laundry, or how we would be able to survive on minimum wage jobs 100s of miles away from home.
But God knew.
And when we got married all those years ago, when I walked down the aisle in my fancy dress to see you standing there, I didn’t know what the next 17 years would bring.
I didn’t know if we would ever have kids, much less the four we were given. I didn’t know you would bring me coffee every morning and fill my car with gas without me having to ask. I didn’t know we would have to walk through surgeries and scars, debt, and doubt. Hanging on to God and one another, even when the world felt crazy.
But God knew.
He knew I needed someone who would make me laugh in labor, and surprise me with a dance in the kitchen on a Tuesday. He knew you needed someone who would tell you you’re appreciated and needed, and see to the details that you missed when you were “taking notes.”
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God has always known the ins and outs and in-betweens of us. The ups and downs, the good days and bad, and even the just okay ones. He’s always been part of our story, even before we sat down next to each other that very first day.
So even though I didn’t know . . . I’m glad God knew.
Originally published on the author’s Facebook