Free shipping on all orders over $75🎄

My husband and I obviously want a lot of children, since we now have six little children who fill our home.

But just because we want lots of children does NOT mean I love being pregnant. I just gave birth to our sixth, and let me tell you, the last two weeks of this pregnancy were the hardest during pregnancy I ever experienced.

It was so intense, that I continued to question myself, “Is it worth the pregnancy?”

I wanted to be thankful; thankful that I carried this baby long-term; thankful that baby and I are well and healthy.

Why was the pregnancy so hard? Why did the last two weeks feel longer than the previous eight months?

Baby’s butt was constantly pressed up against my rib cage.

His feet kept doing those special kicks beyond that bubble he should have been in.

When I sat on the floor reading and interacting with my little ones, oh don’t even let me go there . . . that act of trying to stand back up!

I was waking up every other hour in the night to either a contraction or the sudden urge of needing the bathroom.

And then there were those CONTRACTIONS! They started early in the pregnancy (this is normal for me because of my multiple pregnancies). During the last two weeks, I would have contractions all day long. They were bearable ones, but I constantly wondered, “Is this the real deal?” However, evening would come around, I’d take that hot shower, and VOILA! The contractions would subside.

Disappointment was settling in. I was getting discouraged. Every morning I woke up, I, again, was still pregnant.

So, those thoughts arose. Why is this so hard? Is this really worth it?

I’m pretty sure I tried every possible way to naturally induce myself during those last two weeks.

But nope, nothing seemed to trigger labor.

NOTHING WORKED.

It was a constant battle in my mind. I would remind myself, “I’m so blessed to be carrying this baby! Why am I complaining!?” But then the demands of motherhood, the exhaustion I felt by evening from those contractions made me think differently.

I wanted to complain. I wanted the whole world to know how I felt, that this was not easy.

You know how it all works: the Lord likes to bring people into our lives who know how to sharpen us. There was my husband and a good friend who kept challenging my complaints. They kept me in check.

My wonderful friend constantly challenged me to be thankful, reminding me that there are women who would give anything to be in my position. She was right.

Near the end, my wonderful husband confronted me with the question: “Would you go through this again? Is it worth it?”

I could never get myself to say, “No, I will NEVER go through this again.”

The images of this little newborn, this life placed into my arms, could never get me to agree to that.

So, is a difficult pregnancy worth it? For me, yes. It’s worth every little life that is created because of me. It’s worth every soul Jesus may know because of me.

Yes; it’s all worth it.

You may also like:

Hey Guys, This is Pregnancy

To the People Judging Me For Being Pregnant (Again)

Don’t Ask Her If She’s Pregnant

Want more stories of love, family, and faith from the heart of every home, delivered straight to you? Sign up here!

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Denise Renae

Denise Renae is a stay-at-home mom to a handful of little children and married to her best friend. She has a love for the outdoors, particularly hunting. But she is mostly passionate about seeing other women experience breakthroughs in their journey of marriage and motherhood, as well. While being REAL in her journey, she is striving for perfection within her imperfections. Hop on over to her website at DeniseRenae.com to hear more from her. You can also follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.  

A C-Section Mom Simply Needs You to Hear Her Story

In: Baby, Motherhood
Newborn baby crying in doctor's hands

As an expecting mother, I was told all about the sleepless nights. People made sure to give their opinion on whether I should bottle feed, breastfeed, or exclusively pump. I was told which swaddle to buy, which sound machine worked best, and when to introduce a pacifier. They told me about sleep training but that it really didn’t matter because I wouldn’t get any sleep anyway. Whenever I would mention how scared I was to give birth, I’d always get the same response: oh. honey, don’t worry, your body will know what to do. I remember listening to calming meditations...

Keep Reading

Feed Them—and Other Ways To Help NICU Parents

In: Baby, Motherhood
Parents holding hands of premature baby in NICU

I’ve been thinking quite a bit about our reality as NICU parents to a healthy, brilliant NICU graduate. Our child was born very prematurely and spent weeks in the NICU so he could grow and stabilize. My first experience as a mother of a baby was shattered in so many ways. Trauma still lingers, but I am so grateful for all I have learned from our time beside our little baby in his isolette bed. One thing I learned was that some people who really want to help support NICU parents really don’t know how they can. Here are some...

Keep Reading

From Baby to Boy

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler
Toddler boy asleep with legs tucked under his belly

The sweet snuggles and sighs are slowly making way for more crawling climbing and exploring each day. And just when I think my baby is gone, you snuggle into my chest, convincing me I’m wrong. I watch as you excitedly chase after your sis and giggle as you share with me your slobbery kiss. RELATED: They Tell You To Hold the Baby, But No One Warns You How Fast He Grows Daytime hours bring playful adventures as I watch my baby leave, but then a sleeping bum curled in the air makes me believe that these cherished baby moments haven’t...

Keep Reading

Having Two Under Two Was the Best Decision I Ever Made

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler
Toddler and newborn lying next to each other on a bed

My baby was 14 months old when I found out I was pregnant with baby number two. He had just learned how to walk, still requiring me to walk behind him holding both of his hands above his head so he wouldn’t topple over. In other words, my baby was still very much a baby, and I couldn’t believe I’d be adding another baby to the mix. Excited, but mostly terrified, I researched and read more articles than I can count on what it’s like to be a parent of two under two. These articles more often than not use...

Keep Reading

I Thought Failure to Thrive Meant I Was Failing

In: Baby, Motherhood
Baby drinking bottle, color photo

Failure. That’s all I read. It’s all I saw. It was the only thing I could focus on. I’m sure the doctor said it at some point during the appointment, but it wasn’t until it was right there staring at me in black and white that it clicked . . . “failure to thrive.” I was officially failing my daughter. A couple of years down the road, I now realize how irrational and far from the truth that was, but at the time, it was all I could focus on. I wish more than anything that they had a better,...

Keep Reading

You’re Becoming a Big Sister, But You’ll Always Be My Baby

In: Baby, Kids, Motherhood
Pregnant woman with young daughter, color photo

The anticipation of welcoming a new baby into the world is an exciting and joyous time for our family. From the moment we found out we were expecting to just about every day since, the love and excitement only continue to grow. However, amidst all the preparations for the new addition, I cannot help but have mixed emotions as I look back at old videos and pictures of my firstborn, my first princess, my Phoebe—for she will always hold a special place in my heart. As the anticipation grows, my heart swells with a mix of emotions knowing we are...

Keep Reading

New Mama, It Might Not Be Okay Now but It Will Be

In: Baby, Motherhood
New baby looking at camera, black and white image

It was 2:30 in the morning, I was sitting on the bed with tears streaming down my face, my 7-week-old son crying in my arms. Everything hurt—my engorged breasts, my cracked and bleeding nipples, my back where I had taken two epidurals. It hurt to sit, not only from birth but from the stitches, and I was tired. “It’s okay,” my husband said, rubbing my back in small conciliatory circles, but it wasn’t okay. When they placed my son in my arms for the first time I cried tears of joy, made promises for the future, bolstered by the love I...

Keep Reading

“Please Help Mommy to Be Patient, and the Baby to Stay Alive in Her Tummy.”

In: Baby, Loss, Motherhood
Toddler with hand on mother's pregnant belly

“Please help Mommy to be patient, and the baby to stay alive in her tummy.” It was my little girl’s daily prayer during my pregnancy. That prayer for patience—it stung a bit even though I had told her she could pray that I would be patient. It wasn’t necessarily that she or her sisters were testing my limits, but this pregnancy rage had gotten to be a real thing. If there is one thing motherhood has taught me, it’s that I can’t do it on my own. I need the help of my Heavenly Father, and I need others. I...

Keep Reading

I Know I’m Done, but I’ll Always Want Another Baby

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother touches nose to baby's smiling face, close up color photo

I was sorting clothes into tubs to donate, consign, or keep for my 1-year-old, and I came across a newborn outfit amongst a bunch of bigger kid clothes. I had gotten rid of all of my 1-year-old son’s newborn and infant things last year, but he still seems small and baby-like to me, compared to my 5-year-old. But I’m telling you, when I held up that teeny-tiny outfit, my heart broke. It looked too small to be real. To fit anything other than a doll. But, it did. My older son wore it on his first Christmas. I know I’m...

Keep Reading

I Lost You Just as I Started Loving You

In: Baby, Loss, Motherhood
first trimester ultrasound image of baby

I didn’t know I was already losing you just as I was starting to love you. I didn’t know while I was so excited and hopeful for all the things to come, you were already leaving my body. And my heart. I didn’t know something like this could happen in what feels like both an instant and an eternity. That it would feel like it was just yesterday we saw those two pink lines and yet here we are, eight weeks later, without even an ultrasound picture to hold. I didn’t know how angry it would make me that life...

Keep Reading