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I cried in church this morning.

It wasn’t the beautiful hymns sung by the angelic choir.

It wasn’t the poignant homily given by the Father.

It was the elderly woman sitting a few pews in front of me who sang every song, bowed her head, and wished me peace.

She reminded me of you.

RELATED: I Search for My Mom in Everything, Especially Christmas

I cried in the grocery store today.

It wasn’t because they were out of stock of my favorite coffee creamer and last night was restless.

It wasn’t because the checkout line was around the corner and I still had three more errands to run.

It was the festive container of Christmas cookies in the middle of the display. The ones you always ate in your chair.

They reminded me of you.

I cried on my drive home tonight.

It wasn’t the insane traffic after a long day in the office.

It wasn’t the low gas warning knowing times are hard and the holidays can get expensive.

It was the sound of Elvis on the radio singing “Blue Christmas” as I drove past all the lights and decor. The voice you danced around your kitchen to in your sparkly sweaters.

It reminded me of you.

RELATED: The First Christmas without My Parents Cuts Deep

I cried today because I was reminded of you. I was reminded of the love you showed me through all the little moments in each day. I was reminded of the happy memories we shared, of the unique details that made you special.

I was reminded of the true blessing it was to have you in my life—and the greater blessing it is to know you are at peace watching over me from above.

And though Christmas is extremely hard without you, I was reminded of the joy you brought to my life and the importance of sharing that with others.

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So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Jen Feener

Jen Feener is a wife, mother, public school teacher, travel concierge, and children’s author. Born and raised in Massachusetts, she spends her time playing with her daughters, exploring nature, crafting and making messes in the kitchen. Seeking the adventure in each day, she strives to capture that adventure in her writing.

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