I was that girl

The Sweetest Mother's Day Gift!

I was that girl

The girl you saw with the children that looked as young as her

The girl who danced on the edge of propriety and the abyss

The girl who stood in lines for the food, clothes, shelter that were beyond her reach

I was that girl

The girl who knew the feel of bare knuckles rapping against her skull

And the sting of a man’s hands pressed around her neck

I was that girl

Who knew what it was to fear that day, that instance, that whisper of a moment

Would be the last time she saw this life

I was that girl

And I treasure that girl

In her innocence, I see what I’ve learned

In her bruises, I see what I’ve withstood

In her limitations, I see what I’ve overcome

I was that girl. I am this woman.

abuse Grief

Pamela Homolka

Hi! My name is Pamela Homolka. I am a mom to six beautiful souls on Earth (Anastasia, Devin, John, Chance, Sean, and Alice), and three in Heaven (Nathaniel, Mia, and Lucas). I am also a wife to a wonderful husband of almost nine years and a substitute teacher at Grand Island Public Schools. I haven’t quite decided if I’m a teacher with a writing hobby or vice versa, but I thoroughly enjoy both at any rate. My heart is in Texas, but I dearly love my family and friends in Nebraska and currently reside in Henderson.

I Miss Having Parents

In: Grief

Grown daughter posing between smiling parents

I have been living with the ache of loss for so long that I truly don’t remember what it feels like not to carry it. Sometimes it rests quietly beneath my ribs, dormant and almost polite. Other times it rises without warning—on an ordinary Tuesday afternoon, in the middle of a coffee line—and cuts straight through me. Today, it was a song. I was waiting for my coffee when “Pictures of You” by The Cure drifted through the café speakers. I hadn’t heard it in 20 years. In my twenties, it meant heartbreak—young love unraveling, relationships ending before they were...

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During the weeks we cared for my grandmother in hospice, survival mode felt necessary. There were medications to track. Visitors to update. Logistics to manage. I remember sitting on the couch that served as my makeshift bed and listening to the rhythmic hissing and puffing of the oxygen machine one night. While my mom showered off the day, I texted my sister updates and sent my husband a quick message of love. I could still smell the lavender candle we had lit earlier in the day to mask medical scents. The house was quiet, but my mind wasn’t. I was...

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The Legacy Our Mothers Leave Is In the Details

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It has been two months and nine days since my mom passed away. The first several weeks were spent on the details and logistics of planning her service. She passed in December, so once her beautiful service had passed, I busied myself with the preparations for Christmas. By mid-February, I finally began to process some feelings of grief on a deeper level. The quiet of this less-busy season is allowing the grief to soak in a bit more. Not the big things; not the obvious, grief-heavy reminders that stop me in my tracks. Instead, I’ve been noticing the small things....

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You Never Get Over Losing Your Mother

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My Husband Is By My Side Through Every Storm

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The year 2025 began as a quiet storm. I was slipping into the fog of depression while navigating the early chaos of perimenopause, and some days simply getting out of bed felt impossible. My thoughts felt dark and heavy, my body unfamiliar, my energy nonexistent, and my moods uncontrollable. And yet, in the haze, there was one constant: my husband. He noticed the subtle shifts I barely acknowledged. The sighs, the quiet retreats into myself, the moments I almost broke. Instead of judgment or frustration, he offered presence. He held space for my struggle without trying to “fix” it, and...

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Be intentional. Take the picture. Create memories. Because even when we think we have all the time in the world, one day it will slip away. Sadly, this is exactly what happened to my grandma and me. While I was growing up, my dad and his parents had a strained relationship, and they were estranged for about the first five years of my life. Thankfully, they reconciled, and my grandparents and I finally had the opportunity to establish a much-anticipated relationship. Though I was never able to form the same closeness with them as I had with my maternal grandparents,...

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Adoption - it's not for the weak.

Adoption

Adoption - it's not for the weak.

The Road Home

Inspiration

Pamela Homolka

I Miss Having Parents

What No One Tells You about Losing a Sibling

Grief Didn’t Break Me, It Rearranged Me

I’m Learning To Be Soft and Strong

The Legacy Our Mothers Leave Is In the Details

You Never Get Over Losing Your Mother

My Husband Is By My Side Through Every Storm

Losing My Mom Shaped Me As a Mother

Memories of My Grandma Live On

Netflix Captured What I’ve Treasured for 17 Years: My Daughter’s Room Exactly How She Left It

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

I was that girl

I Miss Having Parents

What No One Tells You about Losing a Sibling

Grief Didn’t Break Me, It Rearranged Me

I’m Learning To Be Soft and Strong

The Legacy Our Mothers Leave Is In the Details

You Never Get Over Losing Your Mother

My Husband Is By My Side Through Every Storm

Losing My Mom Shaped Me As a Mother

Memories of My Grandma Live On

Netflix Captured What I’ve Treasured for 17 Years: My Daughter’s Room Exactly How She Left It

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