My Husband is an ICU Nurse and I Haven't Hugged Him in 3 Weeks

Free shipping on all orders over $75🎄

My heart hurts today.

It’s officially been three weeks since my husband, who is a nurse in the ICU, has touched or held our baby boy.

That’s 20% of our son’s life.

For 20% of his life, his grandparents have had to look at his sweet face over video chat. For 20% of his life, his father has not been able to rock his baby to sleep, feed him a bottle, snuggle his warm little body, give him a kiss to celebrate rolling over for the first time, or try to make him laugh by blowing raspberries on his tummy.

RELATED: We’re Still Making Beautiful Memories in Quarantine With a Newborn

It’s also been 20% of my son’s life that I have been his sole caretaker . . . changing every diaper, doing every middle of the night wake up, feeding every bottle and soothing every cry.

I’m exhausted in every way.

Of course, I’m physically and mentally tired, but oh so emotionally drained. I haven’t hugged or kissed my husband in three weeks. How I long to listen to him breathe while he sleeps next to me or sit close to him on the couch as we watch TV.

RELATED: As a Nurse I’m Begging You: Please Stay Home So I Can See My Daughter Again

I wish I could chat with every person who thinks the regulations set in place are overkill or the people who think they are safe from this awful virus. No one is safe.

And every time you go out, every time you spend time with family or friends, and every time you ignore the precautions, it’s one more day or week or month that my brand new little family has to live like this.

RELATED: As a Healthcare Worker, My Husband Is On the Front Lines. As a Mom, So Am I.

If only you could hear my husband’s anguish as he goes upstairs to his own room to sleep after a long day as a nurse in the ICU, not able to fully explain to anyone the horrors of what he is seeing. If only you could feel the exhaustion that comes from continuing to work full-time from home while taking care of a 3-month-old. If only you could know the feeling of not being able to hold your first grandchild for a month.

Stay at home.

For my baby and my husband. For all of my husband’s patients who are so sick, scared, and alone. Stay at home for us all. Please, I’m begging you.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Her View Shop

Tenley Adams

Tenley Adams is a brand new mama to Will (age three months) and wife to Matthew, an intensive care unit Nurse. She is a full-time school speech-language pathologist in rural Indiana. She loves her dachshund named Minnie, naps, chocolate, binge-watching Netflix and Hulu, and most of all her family.

Marriage Is Too Short to Fight over Trash Bags

In: Marriage

It was a Sunday, and we had just returned from a hospital stay with our medically complex daughter. We needed a reset—one of those “all house chores get tackled in a day” type of resets. We needed a fresh start. Around mid-day, my husband Josh and I were both in full cleaning mode. The morning had been chaotic. Our daughter was struggling with seizures, and our son was still buzzing with excitement from two birthday parties he had attended the day before. As he begged for the banana bread in the oven to cook faster and for more episodes of...

Keep Reading

Your Husband Needs Friendship Too

In: Faith, Friendship, Marriage

As the clock inches closer to 7:00 on a Monday evening, I pull out whatever dessert I had prepared that week and set it out on the kitchen counter. This particular week it’s a trifle, but other weeks it may be brownies, pound cake, or cookies of some kind. My eyes do one last sweep to make sure there isn’t a tripping hazard disguised as a dog toy on the floor and that the leftover dinner is put away. Then, my kids and I make ourselves scarce. Sometimes that involves library runs or gym visits, but it mostly looks like...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, Some Days I Feel So Alone

In: Marriage, Motherhood

Dear my love, I am sitting here at the table you built, back when time was plentiful, and money was sparse. Back when pre-drinks were always at our place, loving sleep-ins were abundant, and the days were our own. I wonder . . . back then, what we might have imagined our life would look like, 10 years later? Would we have pictured the white picket fence, the curly, fair-haired, sensitive little boy and cheeky little girl? We probably would have imagined that we would be hard working, but would we have pictured the deep-set exhaustion that is our day-to-day...

Keep Reading

I Never Thought I’d be Divorced…Twice

In: Living, Marriage

Divorced. I never thought it’d be me. Especially twice divorced. Yet, here I am, single again after two failed marriages. I say failed because the marriages didn’t last. But were they really failures? Failure is defined as a “lack of success.” But by what yardstick is success measured? I know plenty of people in absolutely miserable marriages that I would not consider successful. So is it really fair to call my two marriages failures? I guess it depends on who you ask and what they see as a failure versus a success. Just because a marriage is legally intact doesn’t...

Keep Reading

Marriage Is So Much More than Love

In: Marriage

I met my husband when I was 19. I knew right away there was something there. I was intrigued by him—his looks, his smile, his big heart, his mysterious side. He was unapologetically himself. He listened to his music a little too loud, did his own thing, didn’t try to impress my parents, and lived his life on his own terms. With his hat backward, those big blue eyes, and that mischievous grin . . . I fell hook, line, and sinker. I loved the fact that he had his own house, his own boat, his own life. I was...

Keep Reading

Look for the Green Flags Too

In: Marriage

Couple hugs with twinkle lights in background

We all think we want that storybook romance. We want a partner to sweep into our lives, sing love songs outside of our bedroom window, buy huge bouquets of flowers for no particular reason, publicly declare their love for us every day, and when they’re wrong they should always apologize into a microphone in front of a large crowd. Besides the fact that most of the above are clues that Prince Charming is actually an undercover narcissist and you should probably run far away, this kind of romance sounds rather exhausting. Sure, it sounds fun for a while, but there’s...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, I Remember It All

In: Marriage

Dear husband, I remember when we were dating in high school, all snuggled up sitting on the couch by the fire in your parents’ basement, talking about our hopes and dreams for our future. We both hoped to be in each other’s future. I remember going on so many adventures. All the laughs, the jokes, all the times we got into trouble and said, “This will make a great story afterward.” I remember when you asked me to marry you. We were so young, so naive with no idea of what the future would hold, but we couldn’t have been...

Keep Reading

What Happens When Your Perfect Life Explodes?

In: Grief, Living, Loss, Marriage, Motherhood

Sad woman by window with her head in hands

One day you’re living your best life, writing articles about how perfect your marriage is, and the next, BOOM, life as you know it completely changes. I was blindsided by information that my husband had been lying to me for three years about certain aspects of our lives. I felt like I had been hit in the gut by the biggest rock you could imagine. What has followed has been a snowball of events and new information that has changed the course of my and my kids’ lives. So what do you do when your perfect explodes? This is one...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, In This Busy Season

In: Living, Marriage

Busy family in the kitchen, man walking into the door holding coffee

Dear husband, I know this is a busy season for you. I see how hard you’re working. And I know you come home exhausted every night. I know you’d be here earlier—and more often—if you could. But you can’t. Because this is your busy season. And there are a few things I need you to know. This is hard for me too. Even on normal days, I’m on call 24/7 for the kids, but now, I don’t have you at home as backup. The needing never stops, and I no longer have you to share it with. I can’t say,...

Keep Reading

Attention Husbands, Your Wife Needs Your Touch

In: Marriage

Attention husbands, Your wife needs your touch. And I’m not just talking about sex, though she needs that too, I’m talking about intimacy beyond the bedroom. I’m talking about reaching for her hand while you’re driving. Holding her hand and walking closely in public. Cuddling on the couch while watching TV. Pulling her close and kissing her passionately when she least expects it. Wrapping your arms around her and holding her just for the sake of being close with no other expectations. Pushing the hair back out of her eyes just so you can touch her face. RELATED: The Key to...

Keep Reading

The Advice George Bush Gave Me in Grad School Seems Even More Important Today

Living

The Advice George Bush Gave Me in Grad School Seems Even More Important Today

To the Woman Whose Friend Was Just Diagnosed with Cancer

Cancer

Marriage Is Too Short to Fight over Trash Bags

Your Husband Needs Friendship Too

Dear Husband, Some Days I Feel So Alone

I Never Thought I’d be Divorced…Twice

Marriage Is So Much More than Love

Look for the Green Flags Too

Dear Husband, I Remember It All

What Happens When Your Perfect Life Explodes?

Dear Husband, In This Busy Season

Attention Husbands, Your Wife Needs Your Touch

free email bonus

5 Ways to Connect with Your Kids

My Husband is an ICU Nurse and I Haven’t Hugged Him in 3 Weeks

That’s 20% of our son’s life.

I’m exhausted in every way.

Stay at home.

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Her View Shop

Marriage Is Too Short to Fight over Trash Bags

Your Husband Needs Friendship Too

Dear Husband, Some Days I Feel So Alone

I Never Thought I’d be Divorced…Twice

Marriage Is So Much More than Love

Look for the Green Flags Too

Dear Husband, I Remember It All

What Happens When Your Perfect Life Explodes?

Dear Husband, In This Busy Season

Attention Husbands, Your Wife Needs Your Touch

Previous Post

Next Post

You May Also Like

5 Ways to Connect with Your Kids