“Are you sure?”
“You can always try for a fourth!”
“You just have to have one, they’re so fun!”
As a mom of two boys and our third on the way, I get mixed reactions. This is something I knew would happen. I already practiced my response. I’d like to just take a moment to share some gentle words from the heart of a mama with babies of all the same gender.
Let me first acknowledge that these responses are not meant to be hurtful, but as my bump continues to swell and people ask if I finally got my girl, I realize people must think that for me to have a complete family, I must have one.
God entrusted me with three sweet, beautiful baby boys, and that is what He has called me to be—a boy mom.
And I embrace it at every corner. Every rough-and-tough, loud, and sticky-fingered corner.
So no, I won’t be trading our bow ties for bows, or our suspenders and ties for tutus and tiaras. I’m more than OK cleaning up dirt and grime rather than glitter. My conversations will continue to center around poop and explosions, tractors, and bugs.
My living room will forever be filled with wrestling matches and crumbs embedded into the carpet. I will likely not own any nice vases or lamps in the near future. And forget about any kind of beautiful, white, fluffy throws or light-colored couches. But, would I trade that for anything? No.
Would I have been disappointed if I was expecting a girl? Also, no.
When my husband and I tried for our third baby, we tried for just that. A baby. A sweet, perfectly created squish to snuggle and raise with the same amount of love and guidance regardless of gender.
If you see a mom or dad of all boys or all girls, don’t feel bad for them. And do not, I’ll repeat this for emphasis, do not make comments unless it’s that of expressing joy and blessings. You see, to us, it’s not “a bummer” or “too bad” we aren’t having otherwise. We feel blessed to be able to have babies of our own. A reality that many women and moms do not face.
And if you are a mama who chooses to be done after having babies of all the same gender without trying just one more time for the other, that is more than OK.
It is admirable. Admirable for knowing your family looks just the way it does for a reason and there is no pressure or guilt otherwise. Admirable for seeing your family as complete and not in any way less. You are filled with love and wisdom to pass onto a baby or child of a gender you already have experience in. And what an advantage that is!
I gracefully accept what the Lord has in store for me, my husband, and my boys. And I’m brimming with excitement to welcome a third into our family.
Forever grateful to be a boy mom.